It is 4:02 am as I write this.
I just came from my godsister’s in-laws’ house at Austin High and never before have I believed in the 6 degree thingy as much as I do now.
We talked for the last 5 hours.
She moved to Corpus a year ago and I forgot how much I missed her. She got married yesterday. I’m so glad something finally went right for her!
During these last five hours, we talked about love and heartbreak with them and another bridesmaid.
Love and heartbreak.
You got what you wanted so please don’t look for me.
Joseph and I made a gallon of sweet and sour cocktail mix from scratch today. So time consuming for only ending up with a gallon! :/
Tomorrow, off to buy a bottle of Effen cucumber vodka and a shaker!
He is good to me. Very good. Too good. :)
"We cannot become what we need to be by remaining what we are."
Te dije que me cuidaras y tu no lo hiciste
I hate to admit it but yesterday when I saw how miserable he looked, I felt so bad and just wanted to hold him. I didn’t care about us not being together… I just wanted to make him feel better.
But then again, I thought of all the times I cried, I was never offered consolation but instead, words of anger…
Another thing I hate to admit… Even in a room full of people, I felt our connection. I know his body, his movements, his thoughts, what he does and doesn’t put on his Subway, how much butter he likes on his popcorn, what movies he likes to watch, what he likes to hear, his goals in life, what kind of clothes he likes, what he likes to do on sunny days, etc. Obviously, the small things he never took the time to notice about me. Because if he had, I don’t think we’d be here right now.
He always told me he didn’t care about what happened between us. He wanted to get married but never did the things I thought a good husband would do.
I wanted to show him how well I was doing without him and I did.
I just wasn’t prepared to see how well he isn’t doing.
Next task: Find a way to appreciate the new best friend I have.
I became my ex-bf’s sister’s godmother yesterday.
I feel so bad because he looks so miserable but I based my decision upon his actions… :) And now I’m really confused about how I feel.
I’m glad everyone realized who I am and I’m glad I gained another goddaughter! I caught up to Mel… Finally!!
Why, why do I still have these down days??
I need to stop drinking so much every weekend. Seriously.
:) Only hope, never expect.
\\a>My name is Marissa and I'm a twin. I was afraid to post what I truly thought but I've come to realize it doesn't matter what anyone thinks. That perception changes often. Maybe these entries will be deleted later on. I have a tendency to do that.
I would not exist without my other half. I've never told her how much she means to me.
The best friend/comadre that helps me instead of screwing me over.
This little girl gives me headaches and happy times. I love that she talks now... We bond. :)
My goddaughter, whom I don't get to see very often. If I'm lucky, I see her once a year. I miss you, Maddybear... and no one knows how much. I love you!
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